Racing thoughts fill my mind

My body tenses, I gasp for air

I pound my fist on the side of my head

Stop, I yell.

 

Words jumble in my mind

One thought becomes another

They start with a small worry

With each new thought the worry grows

 

My mind jumps from one thought to another

My car insurance increases

I ruined dinner

There’s never enough money for bills

 

The thoughts rip at my insides

They torment me like an angry storm

They won’t shut up

They take control of my body

 

I must fight

I can’t let them win

I fight them with positive thoughts

I argue with them

 

The thoughts fight back

I refuse to give up

I journal

I list good things

 

I gain control of my breathing

My body relaxes

I release my fist

My thoughts calm

 

The battle is won

No award is given

Yet I earn a badge of courage

My award is the light of recovery