Tag: Mental Illness

FOCUSING ON THE POSITIVES OF 2025

Published on by Aimee EddyLeave a comment

When we get close to the end of the year many of us say, “I’m ready for this year to end. It was a bad year.”

We often focus on all the bad things that happened in the year, forgetting there were also good things. It’s easy to think about everything that went wrong in the year so that we can hope that a new year will be better. But it shouldn’t be the negatives of the past year that carry us into a new year. It should be the positives that build bridges for an even better year.

I can easily go through a list of things that went wrong in 2025. It was a rough year with my loved one being diagnosed with dementia and diabetes. I could easily talk about everything that went wrong in the past year, but it serves no purpose. Instead, I will list the positive things that happened in 2025.

Below is my list of positives:

  • I received an award from the president of the United States; I received a proclamation from Buffalo, NY’s mayor, declaring February 21 “Aimee Eddy Day” and I also received other awards for my work for One Life Project.
  • I had cataract surgery on both of my eyes, giving me new vision. I can see without glasses. I just need reading glasses.
  • My husband and I have taken many rides around Erie’s Peninsula. We enjoyed the scenery and time together.
  • My husband retired and I no longer must take the bus to work.
  • I threw a surprise retirement party for my husband and he was shocked. He loved the party.
  • We spent a romantic night in a hotel for our wedding anniversary.
  • I celebrated thirty years at my job with a dinner at Acrisure Stadium and a tour of the stadium.
  • I found a therapist that I really like who is helping me through my loved one’s dementia.
  • I got to see my niece and her family whom I haven’t seen in a few years.
  • I got Thanksgiving week off from work which I haven’t had off in thirty years.

I must admit I had to really think hard about the positives of last year. The bad things that happened weigh me down, but coming up with this list lessened my burdens. It made me realize that last year wasn’t so bad after all. I’m not throwing away a bad year; instead I’m using the positives of 2025 to build a positive bridge into 2026.

I know with mental illness it’s easy to just see the negatives in your life, but there are positives. To you 2025 was a bad year and you don’t see any hope for 2026. Try sitting down with a sheet of paper and reflecting on the past year. Think about the good things that happened like a friend who called to check on you, or after several days in bed you got out of bed. There are positives in your life and if you think hard, you’ll find them. Look at 2026 as a year with hope and new beginnings.

Going into the 2026 with hopes for a good year helps me stay in the light of recovery.

NEW EYES AND A NEW LOOK AT LIFE

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I had my second cataract surgery on my right eye on Monday, December 8. The surgery went well without any complications. It was strange; I could hear the doctor and nurses talking and I felt pressure on my eye, but no pain. I wasn’t awake, but I wasn’t completely asleep either. The doctor put a patch on my right eye, and when the nurse took it off the next day the world around me changed.

I got my first pair of glasses in fourth grade. I tried not to wear them as much as possible, but that made seeing difficult. As the years went by, the lenses got thicker. They grew heavier and I had to constantly push them up. I tried to get thin frames, hoping it would make the glasses less heavy, but it didn’t help much. I became accustomed to my bulky glasses. They became a part of me. Every morning, I put them on, all day long I pushed them up, and every night I took them off. It was a routine.

Mental illness is like wearing glasses. We don’t want to admit we have it, so we avoid it as much as possible. Then the racing thoughts, negative thinking, hopelessness, and loss of self esteem grow thicker and thicker. We become accustomed to it and begin to live our lives in darkness. We believe the mental illness has become a part of us. We wake up to it, we drown in it all day long, and we go to bed with it.

With my eyes, cataracts made seeing extremely difficlt. I used a bright light and a magnifying glass to see better. When I went through cataract surgery on my left eye, things started to look brighter. Then I went through cataract surgery on my right eye and when they took the patch off, I could see everything better. I could see a brighter and better world. I was amazed at what I could see without glasses. It was like I got new eyes.

 Some things remain hard to see like words in a book and the guide on the TV. I got a pair of readers but will eventually need prescription glasses to see words on the TV and signs in the distance while driving.

Similar to cataracts, mental illness makes life look like a never-ending road of sadness. You use a therapist, medication, coping techniques, and a psychiatrist to help you find your way to the light. You fight a battle with your illness and in time life begins to look brighter. You take medication to balance the chemicals in your brain, and you change the way you think. Then you climb out of the dark hole and see a brighter and better life. But you still need medication and coping techniques to continue in the light of recovery.

Getting surgery for cataracts gave me a new look at the world, like reaching recovery gave me a new look at life. Since my vision was bad, cataract surgery couldn’t repair my vision completely. Recovery from mental illness doesn’t cure a person completely. There is nothing wrong with having extra aid to get through. I can’t see without glasses to read, and I can’t stay in recovery without coping techniques and medication. Cataract surgery wasn’t a complete cure for my vision, and recovery doesn’t mean I’m cured of mental illness.

There may not be a cure for mental illness, and you will need coping techniques to get through bad days, but your world will look brighter. Just like my world looks brighter after my cataract surgeries. You can live a happy life and find joy. So, I encourage you to fight for recovery and learn to see your life differently.

I not only see the world differently because of cataract surgery, but I see life differently because I stand in the light of recovery.

LET’S TALK ABOUT MENTAL ILLNESS

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We talk openly about cancer, diabetes, heart disease, eye diseases, and many others. We never judge people with physical illnesses. We know people have no control over these sicknesses, but it’s different with mental illness. Mental illness is not talked about as openly as physical illnesses. Many times when it’s discussed, it is met with judgment and stigma. Because of this many people do not understand mental illness and those who have it hide it fearing they will be judged.

When you have diabetes, you take medicine to maintain it, you change your diet, and each day you take care of yourself to keep this illness under control. Mental illness is not much different. With mental illness you take medicine to control the symptoms, you go to therapy to learn how to manage your illness, and you take care of yourself with coping techniques to keep your illness under control. Like diabetes you have a plan of action and care. Mental illness is like any other illness, yet the sickness is treated differently.

When I was a child and teen, mental illness wasn’t talked about. I didn’t know what it was or that I had it. I just knew something was wrong with me. I didn’t find out about mental illness until I found a pamphlet about depression at college. Even when I learned more about mental illness, I was afraid to tell people that I struggled with it. I’ve heard people talk about people with mental illness as being crazy, and I’ve seen TV shows that made fun of the illness. I didn’t want to be judged, so I put on a smile when I was out in public and fell apart when I was at home.

As an adult, I was hospitalized for my illness. After I was released, I returned to work only to be met by stigma and judgment. A co-worker asked me if I was in the looney bin. When I returned to my job, I worked in the bakery department. Every time I got a simple cut, they asked me if I did it myself. When I got upset at work, I had a box cutter in my hand, and the bakery manager assumed I hurt myself with it. I was forced to sit in an office to talk to crisis, a program that helps people who are really struggling, when I didn’t need to. Later the store manager said that managers could treat me as they needed to because I was a danger to employees and customers. If I’d had problems with any other illness, I would not have endured such judgment.

We judge mental illness because it’s a sickness of the mind. It’s hard to understand when the mind doesn’t function properly, but if we talk about mental illness more frequently and openly, then we can break the stigma. To talk about this sickness, we must also educate society. That’s why I write this blog post and work for One Life Project. I want people to see that mental illness is like any other illness, and we should put an end to the stigma.

If you struggle with mental illness, talk about it with your friends, family, and co-workers. Give them information about your illness or invite them to a therapy session. When I was dating my husband, he went to therapy with me to learn about my illness and how to help me. Let’s push schools and workplaces to talk frequently about mental illness. We need to stop judging mental illness and see it as equal to physical illness.

Many people are struggling in silence with mental illness because they are afraid if they tell someone, they will be judged. If we talk about mental illness without stigma, then more strugglers will ask for the help they need, and we can save many lives. I urge you to stop judging and start speaking out about mental illness.

I work hard to fight the stigma that surrounds mental illness so that some day we can talk about it as openly as we do any other illness. I now openly talk with others about my sickness, and this helps shine a light on my path of recovery.

WRITER’S BLOCK AND MENTAL HEALTH

Published on by Aimee Eddy2 Comments

Some people think that writer’s block doesn’t exist, but it does. I learned in a one day writing conference that there are things that cause writer’s block, such as something is wrong with the story, physical problems, and emotional problems. Sometimes there is something wrong with your WIP (work in progress) that you just can’t figure out. You could also be going through physical problems that may make writing hard. Your mental health can affect your ability to concentrate and write.

I have been searching for the reason I can write this blog but not my next memoir. The words won’t come to me, and I’ve lost the inspiration to work on it. The workshop I took spoke to me. As the instructor talked about the mental health issues that affect a person’s ability to write, I realized that is the reason I can’t work on my next memoir.

I kind of knew what was wrong with my husband before he was diagnosed, but I hoped it was something else. Hearing the doctor’s say diagnosis confirmed what I thought was wrong, shredded my hopes, and made everything very real. I attempted to fight back my tears, but they came anyway. At that moment my whole life, my whole world changed.

I have been in recovery from mental illness for years, but since my husband’s diagnosis I’ve been struggling. My husband is the love of my life, and I have depended on him for many things. To find out he’s sick and only going to get sicker has sent me in and out of depression. I have many emotions running through me. I’m angry, I’m sad, I’m frustrated, I’m scared, and much more. I’m trying hard to be strong, but sometimes I feel weak.

I know my husband is sad about his illness. I don’t blame him, but I don’t know how to help him. I take him for rides after work, I try to do fun things with him, and I attempt to get him to talk about his feelings. He has always taken care of me. When I had a bad day with my mental illness, he always knew how to lift my spirits and help me through it. When I was sick, he would take care of me and wait on me. When I had surgery, he took care of me and took me for rides. He always made sure I took my medication.

Now my husband and I have switched roles. I have had seven surgeries and health problems, and he was my caregiver through it all. Now I’m his caregiver. I’m happy to do it. I married him to be there through sickness and health. I believe he’s stronger than I am. He took care of me without showing sadness or any other emotions. Maybe he kept his feelings inside, but some days I just want to lie in bed and cry while taking care of him. I try to hide my tears, but he sees them.

It’s hard to work on my next memoir when I’m trying to deal with all these emotions I have about my husband’s illness. To write my next memoir I must be strong enough to relive the past, and right now I don’t feel strong enough. I’m dealing with too many emotions to take on reliving past emotions. I can write this blog post because I don’t go deep into my feelings to write most of these.

I wrote down my thoughts and feelings about not being able to write and let my therapist read it. She read it and we discussed it. She told me she’ll help me deal with my feelings and told me she’s proud of me with how I am handling everything. That meant the world to me, because I feel like I’m doing a bad job at handling everything. I have been afraid that I would never be able to finish my book, and I would only have one published book. I’m now hopeful that she will be able to help me get back to writing my next memoir.

If you’re struggling with writer’s block because of mental health issues, journal out your feelings, try coping techniques, and get help. Once you take care of your mental health, you’ll be able to work on your WIP again.

I believe with the help of my therapist I will be able to overcome my writers block and finish my next memoir. Working though my feelings and learning to cope with my husband’s illness will help me climb back into the light of recovery again.

CELEBRATING MY THIRTY YEARS

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This Past Wednesday I went to Pittsburgh, PA, to a dinner at Acrisure Stadium, the home of the Steelers football team, to celebrate my thirty years at the grocery store where I work. They celebrated people of different years, starting with twenty-five years and then every five years after. A video was played for what happened at the grocery chain each year that was celebrated. I remember 1995 for more than just starting a new job. It was the year I decided I needed to take care of my mental illness.

Thirty years ago, I was deeply depressed, suicidal, and self-injuring. I tried very hard to push through college, but despite my good grades, I was drowning inside and couldn’t continue. I decided I needed to take a year off and take care of my mental health. My plan was to work at the grocery store for a year or until I was well enough to finish college. Then I would quit, get my two-year degree, and go on to a four-year college, but God had other plans for me.

I started in the bakery. The manager yelled a lot, we had to remember prices of baked goods in the display case, we had to take cake orders and roll orders from customers, and I struggled with that. I talked to no one except when I had to. Every time the manager yelled, I wanted to curl up in a corner and cry. The manager reminded me of the teachers who put me down in school. I fought each day to pull myself out of bed and go to work. I wanted to REMAIN unseen, but that was impossible in a busy grocery store.

After a week or two in the bakery, the manager decided I was not a good fit there. I was moved up to the front of the store, known as the front end. I was given the job of bagger. I didn’t have to talk as much to customers and bagging was much easier than remembering prices. I was still silent unless forced to speak. I bagged groceries and pushed carts, but inside I felt like curling up in my bed and crying until the tears would no longer fall. I wanted my agony to end, and I found relief in hurting myself. My mom went out of her way to get me into therapy.

As I went to my therapy sessions, I pushed my way through my workdays. Cashiers started talking to me between customers. They asked me questions about my family and so on. My replies were short, but as time went by, my answers became longer. I started making friends, I was on medicine for depression, I was going to therapy weekly, and my depression began to lift. In grade school, making new friends was difficult and I was alone a lot, but at my job I became popular. My co-workers liked me for who I was, and that to me was the most beautiful feeling ever.

After my year off from college was up, my depression had lifted, and I returned to college on a part time basis. I continued to work at the store on weekends. In time I became a cashier and began to hold conversations with my customers. I started to get customers who made a point to come and see me, no matter how long my line was. I found that I enjoyed my fellow employees and customers.

In 1999 I graduated from college and went to work at my job during the week and on weekends. I realized with my mental illness and learning disability, I couldn’t go on to a four-year college. It took me several years just to get a two-year degree. I was on a high, though. For the first time in my life, I had friends and a social life. I even began dating, something I never got a chance to do in high school. I stayed out until 2:00 AM bowling with friends, drove half an hour home, and got up and went to work at 8:00 AM. I didn’t get much sleep, but I had fun.

Through my thirty years at the grocery store I overcame mental illness, stopped self-injuring, made friends, tore down my wall, became social, slid into mental illness again, went through many health problems, and found the love of my life. I can’t forget that I recovered from mental illness a second time. I grew into a better and stronger person over the years. For a while I regretted not being able to go to a four-year college, but in time I realized how much I loved and still love working with people.

My customers brighten my day. Each one is special like the one that calls me super woman, and the one who likes it when I tease him, and he tells my customers to pull my finger. There’s the older guy who says I’m cheating on him with my husband and the woman who brings me a pamphlet with interesting facts to read. There are ones who have passed on, ones that are like friends, and ones I’m getting to know. Each customer is special, and they always ask me how I can always be smiling. My reply is, “I love working with people.”

Despite mental illness, I preserved and found happiness and success as a cashier. Sometimes God has different plans for us then what we have for ourselves. Even if you don’t accomplish the goals you set for yourself, that doesn’t mean you failed. Push through your mental illness to reach recovery and discover God’s plans for you. You can make dreams come true, you can build a successful future, you can find new paths, and much more.

I’m proud of my thirty years at my job. I accomplished a lot on the job and personally. I stand in the light of recovery because I didn’t give up.

USING YOUR CREATIVITY TO EXPRESS FEELINGS

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Most people are creative. They find joy in art, music, writing, dance, and crafts. Many people use their creative skills to relax and escape from the stressors of life. For people struggling with mental illness, using the creative side of your brain can be a way to express pent up feelings or to tell others how you are is feeling. It’s an excellent coping mechanism.

When I was in high school, I turned to writing to cope with the feelings built up inside me. Feelings of loneliness, sadness, anger, and much more. I poured my feelings out in folders of college ruled paper. I created worlds I could escape to; I filled my characters with the feelings I felt and then I created happy endings. With my stories I felt like I was in control while in real life I felt like I was out of control.

In high school many of my stories were dark and depressing, because that’s how I felt. My mom even suggested that I try adding positivity in my writing. When I was caught in an abusive friendship, I wrote poems about how I felt about the friend. Some of my feelings were distorted and confusing, but I worked them out in my writing. I filled a folder full of poems trying to deal with my feelings about the friend and to understand what she was doing to me.

When my uncle was killed, I wrote about him and what he meant to me and how his loss affected me. I still write about the loved ones I lost in my life. It helps me deal with my grief. It helps me release my feelings and commemorate my loved one’s memory.

I joined a support group for mental illness. One of the strugglers in the group posts a drawing of how she feels each day. Others post drawings and paintings of things that express their feelings. There are also art therapy groups that focus on using art to help people express themselves, explore emotions, and improve mental health.

I use woodburning to express my emotions. I pick out patterns that show my feelings and help me explore my emotions in an imaginative and creative way. Sometimes I combine patterns to make a picture that expresses my feelings the best. The weight of my emotions pours out in the careful twist of my woodburning pen. The smell of burning wood eases my anxiety. As I create my woodburnings, my bad feelings are set free, and excitement and joy replace them.

Other arts that help express emotions are:

  • Painting uses colors and brush strokes to express emotions.
  • Music lets individuals express emotions in a way that is accessible and less inhibiting than words.
  • Dance can help an individual channel emotion in a way that is both expressive and freeing.
  • Collage and craft help an individual express emotion in an imaginative and creative way.

How can you express your feelings creatively through forms of art? You might not be very creative, and your drawings might be stick figures, but it doesn’t matter. You can doodle, you can just dance around your living room, you can scribble, you can knit a sweater with uneven arms, and you can journal random thoughts to express yourself. It doesn’t matter how good your art is. All that matters is that you express your feelings.

Writing my book, Escape from the Garage: Family Love Overcomes Bullying, helped me express my feelings about the bullying I faced as a child. By expressing my feelings, I was able to heal myself and find peace with my past. Writing is my creative outlet for my emotions, and it helps me stand in the light of recovery.

FRIENDSHIPS AND BOUNDARIES

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True friendship is a special thing, and it doesn’t come easily. A good friendship takes work. Both friends must give equally and understand each other’s boundaries. When a person is struggling with mental illness, it becomes hard to be a good friend. The person struggling has a hard time understanding boundaries and finds it hard to be able to listen and support a friend. Even in recovery a person struggles with friendships and boundaries.

Being a friend to a person in the depth of the hole of mental illness takes a lot of patience, understanding, and strength. A person struggling is trapped in his or her own agony, and he or she finds it impossible to be supportive, able to listen, and honor boundaries. He or she can barely handle his or her own problems let alone others’ problems. They often step on their friend’s boundaries, expecting too much, and become angry when the friend can’t give as much as he or she needs.

When in recovery, a person is stronger and more able to handle other’s problems, but must keep to his or her own boundaries. In recovery he or she are continually taking care of her or himself to stay well. When the struggler is having a hard time, he or she must focus on him or herself. It’s important for the person with mental illness to tell his or her friends when he or she must take a step back for a bit to focus on the persons own well being.

I have been struggling emotionally with my husband’s illness, and now he has another illness on top of that. I’m feeling overwhelmed, sad, and anxious. Several times I have teetered at the edge of that dark hole of depression. I’m trying to prepare for the future while handling what is going on with him now. It’s a lot to handle. I worry a lot, I slip into bouts of depression, and I have anxiety attacks.

A good friend of mine is also going through a hard time and she calls me almost every night to confide in me, but I have found it hard to listen to her problems and deal with my own. I told her I couldn’t handle her problems right now. She replied, “I didn’t ask you to handle my problems.”

When I care about a person and he or she confides in me or vents to me, I become emotionally involved. When I’m struggling with my mental illness, I can’t become involved because I’m barely hanging on. I must put myself first, so I don’t fall down that hole again. That’s when I need to put up my boundaries and stick to them. My friend didn’t call me for a couple of days. I feared she was mad at me. When I told her I was feeling better and could talk to her, she seemed distant.

What I needed from her was support, encouragement, and listening ears while I struggled, but instead I received silence. My Borderline Personality kicked in, and I feared she was abandoning me. I became angry and played over in my head how I would confront her, but I decided instead to write a nice email explaining why I couldn’t listen to her problems. I came to the realization that she too has boundaries and I can’t expect everyone to be able to handle my illness.

In time my friend started confiding in me again. Then my husband and I had an appointment with his doctor about his new illness. I became overwhelmed with the things I needed to do for him. Plus, I’m trying to help my sister with her vision problems and we keep hitting dead ends. I was feeling emotional and when my friend called, I confided in her and forgot to ask about her problems. She became mad at me and when I tried to explain we ended up arguing. I decided for my well being and for the sake of our friendship, I needed to take a break from the friendship. At this point in my life, I need to focus on keeping myself well and depend on friends who can be supportive and understanding.

Not every friend you have understands how to help you or is able to give the support you need during hard times. You can teach them, but it’s up to them if they can handle your illness. If they can’t that is okay. Mental illness is a hard illness to handle, and you must respect your friends’ boundaries. Know which friends you can turn to while you’re struggling and know that those friends also have boundaries. Respecting your friends’ boundaries and letting your friends know about your own boundaries will help you build a strong relationship.

Knowing that I have good friends and using boundaries and respecting boundaries helps me stand tall in the light of recovery.

VALIDATING FEELINGS

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A person with mental illness struggles with a lot of feelings. To others not struggling, those emotions seem minor or confusing. They might not understand why a person is feeling depressed without a reason or when the person’s life seems to be good. It sometimes becomes too easy for others to brush off or minimize the feelings of the one who is struggling. Even though you don’t see a reason for a person’s feelings, to the one who is sick those emotions are real and powerful. How you handle the person’s feelings is crucial.

When you brush off a person’s emotions, you make him or her feel like he or she is not important. When a person who is sick is made to feel like what he or she is going through is not significant, it can deepen depression, lead to suicide, or cause the person to turn to unhealthy coping techniques. It’s very important that you validate the person’s feelings.

What you say to a person who is struggling is meaningful. Don’t say, “What do you have to be depressed about?” or “Oh well, it will get better.” By saying this, you are dismissing how the person feels. Even though you don’t understand why a person is depressed, those emotions are very real.

Here is a list of ways to validate a person’s feelings:

  • Listen actively. Nod your head and maintain eye contact. Don’t interrupt the person as she or he talks. By showing you are listening, you are making the person feel like he or she is being heard. The person will be more willing to confide in you.
  • Show sympathy. Tell the person, “I’m sorry you’re feeling this way. Is there anything I can do to help you?” Showing sympathy helps him or her feel like you care, and you are willing to help. Too often a person who is sick feels like nobody in the world cares about him or her.
  • Acknowledge the feelings. Tell the person you accept his or her feelings even if you don’t understand or if you have another perspective. By doing this, you are telling the person that you know his or her feelings are real to them and important.
  • Identify the problem. Ask the person about what is going on in his or her life that could cause these feelings. This can help you understand better. Helping the person identify the reason for his or her feelings; this can open a door for him or her to understand what is going on inside.
  • Don’t be judgmental. Don’t give advice or offer solutions unless you understand what the person is going through. Don’t form your own opinions about why the person is feeling the way she or he feels. Judging can make the person feel angry and more depressed.
  • Use validating statements. Use statements like “This must be hard for you,” “I understand how you would feel this way,” “I’m truly sorry you had to deal with…” and “I too would feel that way if I were in your situation.” These and other validating statements can be found at 25 Examples of Validating Statements to Show Empathy – Happier Human
  • Don’t minimize. Don’t make the person’s feelings seem small and unimportant. To the person, what he or she is going through is a big thing. If you make him or her sound small, you will cause more pain and make him or her feel dismissed.

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By validating a person who is struggling with feelings, you are showing him or her you care, he or she can confide in you, the person is not alone, and he or she is important. If you have a friend or loved one struggling with mental illness, use this list to help the person feel seen, cared for, and heard. By doing this you can help your friends and loved ones through their rough times without sending them deeper into their illness.

I have a friend and husband who is very good at validating my feelings, and they get me through many rough times. This helps me stand in the light of recovery.

*Information for this blog post can be found at how to validate someone with mental illness feelings – Search

FINDING PURPOSE

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I’ve been so deep down the hole of darkness and inner agony that I thought the light would never shine again. I cried tears of torment, tears that dripped down my cheeks and hurt like bee stings to the soul. I’ve been stomped down by words, whipped by prejudice, scared by illness, and torn apart by loss. Yet I have always found a way to pull myself up to the light.

What is it that makes us strong enough to weather the torrential rains of life? What pulls us up when we’re lying at the darkest depths of our illness? What makes us strong when we feel weak? How do we stand up when everything seems to be pushing us down?

How often have you wondered if the light would ever shine for you? Have you lost hope that it would? I once lost hope and felt my life was just a dark endless pit of pain. I have lain down at the bottom of my hole and curled up in a ball, begging the Heavenly Father to end my life. When he wouldn’t, I took it on myself to find a way to die, but something wouldn’t let me go. Was it God or my own willpower hidden within my pain? I believe it was both.

There is always a reason for our existence even when we can’t see it. Finding that reason may seem impossible and we might have our eyes closed when pain rears its head, but it’s there. God has a purpose for each one of us. To fulfill our purpose, we must dig deep into our souls, down to the pit of our very being to find willpower, strength, and determination to fight the darkness. To pursue our desire to climb out of the darkness and find our purpose we must fight that awful demon called mental illness. We must take it root by root and use it to pull ourselves up.

I did it. I climbed out of that dark hole, pulling myself up by its roots while setting each root on fire on my way up. I slipped a couple of times, falling back down and lying in my tears and agony for a moment. Then I began my climb to the top again. Once at the top, I searched long and hard for my God-given purpose. I looked hard for it until I realized it was staring at me.

While in the darkness, I gave up on my writing and my dream to publish a book. I thought I was only meant to write short stories for a while. Then one day I found my purpose and realized my writing was my reason for all my suffering. My writing was God’s reason for standing beside me in my darkest days. He knew I could help many with words written in a book, in this blog, and in speeches. I suffered to help and to educate others. My purpose is also to help young people through One Life Project.

Are you sitting at the bottom of your dark hole feeling there is no reason for your existence? If so, dig deep inside yourself for your hidden strength and determination and start climbing towards the light. Are you in the light but have not found your purpose? Sit still, close your eyes, and concentrate. Think about the things you can do, the life you have led, and open your eyes. Then look hard and you’ll find your purpose.

Your struggles and pain are not for nothing. There’s meaning in them. They help you grow and become stronger. They lead you to your reason for living. We struggle so we can stand up tall and do God’s will.

I still tumble into my illness, and at times I stand at the edge of that hole, but I hold on tight to my reason for living and God’s purpose for me. God reaches down to hold me up in the light of recovery.

FADING AWAY

Published on by Aimee Eddy6 Comments

Here with me

But parts of you are

Fading away

I try my hardest

To be strong

I fight my tears knowing

In time more

Of you will fade away

I stand strong for you

But inside I feel weak

Each memory is precious

For so long I have

Leaned on you

Now I must be your rock

I cry when you don’t see

I confide in friends

I find support where I can

I practice self-care

I returned to therapy

As parts of you fade away

I will fight to

Stay in the light

Nurturing myself

Leaning on broad shoulders

Helps me stay in

the light of recovery